Jerks and Jackanapes: Lyn

The evening started well enough when the redoubtable Jeremy Montague Dimsmeed-Smyth arrived to take Annabelle to dinner.

What happened between then and now might have remained a mystery but for one thing: Annabelle did not want it to remain a mystery.

Sophie winced as the front door slammed and the surrounding windows rattled. She looked up as her cousin stormed into the study.

“Jeremy is a jerk!”

Annabelle’s well-aimed kick sent the wastepaper bin spinning across the floor. “He told me that it was a woman’s duty…duty! Can you believe it?”

“What was a woman’s duty?” Sophie tried to keep the laughter out of her voice, and failed miserably, but Annabelle appeared not to notice as her outburst continued. “He said women were created for man’s pleasure, to render him companionship and be his helpmate.”


“Jeremy is a jerk!”

“Yes, I think we’ve established that.”

“What?” Annabelle seemed to become aware Sophie was speaking to her. “Established what?”

“That Jeremy is a jerk.”

“That’s what I was just saying.” Annabelle threw her hands in the air. “Oh you never listen, Sophie…I’m going to bed.”

Sophie watched her cousin flounce up the stairs and grimaced as she waited for another door slam. She was not disappointed.

The next three days were accompanied by much muttering – from Annabelle, much eye rolling – from Sophie, and a scarcity of apologies from Jeremy.

On the evening of the fourth day, Annabelle appeared at the top of the stairs and paused for full effect. She was, in the colloquial language of her peers, ‘dressed to the nines’.

Sophie grinned and gave her a wolf-whistle. “My, my, it would seem Cinderella is going to the ball.”

Annabelle remained at the top of the stairs. “One must be appropriately dressed when one delivers a coup-de-gras.” Her response was as enigmatic as her smile.

The chiming of the doorbell interrupted Sophie’s response, and Annabelle waved her hand royally towards the door. “Would you mind getting that Sophie darling, that will be dear Jeremy.”

Sophie’s eyes grew wide in wonder, “But I thought Jeremy was a jerk.”

“Shhh.” Annabelle placed a finger to her lips, “The door please Sophie.”

Annabelle began a slow, sensuous, descent of the stairs. Even a spiral staircase, could not have made the effect any better.

Jeremy stepped forward to meet her, “I’m glad you’ve come to your senses my dear,” he raised her hand to his lips, “Mother was right; you’re offspring will make a satisfactory addition to our family line.”

“Oh, Jeremy.” Annabelle all but simpered.

He pulled her closer and as his lips touched hers, she responded with enthusiasm.

Jeremy lifted his head and looked hungrily into her eyes. “I see you’re finally learning the true meaning of lip service.”

Annabelle smiled, drew back and delivered a savage straight right into his mouth. His knees buckled and as he lay unconscious on the floor, Sophie grinned and said; “Now that is what I call lip service.”

Words: 494

Author Bio:

Recently retired. Mother of three, grandmother of eight. Have loved writing stories for as long as I can remember. Have recently completed my first novel, which is currently being edited..

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